I hadn't snowshoed since my mom died until today.
My sister in law, Leanne and I went out earlier today for a hike, and it was tough going. I've never worked so hard at snowshoeing. Since I haven't been out, there were no trails and no base. We tried to walk on snowmobile tracks, but even that didn't help so much.
We went across the field, and through the swamp. It was deep. So deep. We made it to the place where I usually enter the woods to go up to the first beaver pond, but the snow was just too deep. Absolutely impassable. We turned back, hiking along our path through the swamp. I wasn't done, though. I NEEDED more time alone, more time in the woods.
I set off for a short hike through the woods, and down to the lower field.
Sometimes the hardest things we do are the most important. The hardest things to say, feel or do physically. Sometimes we need to push through to the other side. Today I needed physical exertion and silence. I needed to get back outside, where I haven't been since my mom died. I feel everything when I'm alone. I needed to face this today. I'm glad I stuck it out, but it was tough going.